I forgot to write this introduction to the counting of the Omer. The omer counting is a period of self reflection different than other times of year. It helps develop discipline, which is needed for a spiritual life. Just as the Jews went through a period of growth and self-knowledge after they marched from bondage and slavery into freedom, we have the chance each year to also experience that personal growth. We prepare for Matan Torah, the giving of the torah on Shavuot. Can you imagine how much better I do when I prepare for something, than when I try to wing it? Yes, I can go into Shavuot on a limb, and it will still be a high. But I am fooling myself if I think that 7 weeks of preparation won’t help bring the whole thing so much higher, and connect me to the meaning of the holydays, and the revelation at Mt. Sinai.
Today is the fifth day of the omer corresponding to the sefira of hod within chesed, or humility within lovingkindness, which is also order in grace. Distinguishing from one kind of love and another, as opposed to being cynical at all love, realizing that there is so much love available, and that I have so much love to give.